You know sometimes people see a happy couple and instead of trying to figure out their secrets to happiness you get annoyed by all the lovey dovey going on. I've learned some things about being and staying happy. It's all in the mind, perception and wanting to put in the effort. I've been in the same relationship for years. Furthermore, I've also been on both sides of this. So here's some things that work for me.
Courtesy of -Nina
"Have a designated movie night."
~The time to cuddle is constant. Watching a good movie enhances your common interest and you can share a few good laughs or watery eyes. Lol
"Make date nights a necessary priority."
~It doesn't always have to be big. The little things count too.
"Try new things together."
~Mix it up. Make dating your partner like an adventure and always keep the vibe positive. Try not to talk about negative things while enjoying your time. Remember It's all about having fun together. Making memories.
"Take an interest in their interest."
~You may not know everything about what your partner is really into but take some time to learn more about it and ask questions. They will appreciate your efforts. You want to spark it up. There's nothing more satisfying than knowing your partner takes genuine interest in what you do.
"Keep your business between the two of you."
~What happens between the two of you should stay between the two of you. One of the biggest mistakes couples make is divulging private things to people outside their relationship. No one can handle your problems or fix them better than the two of you. Plus it not only strengthens your bond when you overcome obstacles together but it keeps unnecessary drama from entering into your bond.
"Be spontaneous."
~So what you didn't plan it. It's exciting and fun not to know sometimes. Do it anyway. Go along anyway. If there will be more joy and no regrets then go for it. Be tasteful.
"Say I love you often and mean it. Most importantly show it."
~A long term relationship can sometimes become stagnant and the meaning behind the words may not match the effort. So always do what's necessary to show your partner that you need them in your life and adore them. Some people may shy away from the word need. However, I believe if you truly love eachother you can't bare the thought of losing eachother. That to me is a need. A mutual one.
"Don't keep secrets."
~This one is quite simple. It's a violation of trust. Also if the truth comes out it may be the end for some forever. So be open. You should trust eachother enough to confide on anything. Even if it's slightly uncomfortable. If It's bothering you then say something.
"Share eachother and don't be stingy."
~ Being affectionate and showing physical admiration and intimacy is sacred. In addition, it shouldn't be pressured or scheduled. That is boring and takes all of the fun out of it. Allow your partner to be natural about things and you do the same. You two should be like canvases to eachother. I can't tell another person how to be passionate. If the chemistry and passion is truly there then you'll know what I'm talking about. Just like a good piece of artwork, what would you do to make it perfect?
"Keep up with eachother throughout the day."
~ It's easy to get caught up in the 9 to 5 and lost in gossip and things with other coworkers. Make it a habit to reach out to your partner and see how they are doing at some point of your day. If either of you has had a bad day then support eachother.
"Have like minds, share common goals and don't be afraid to say I'm sorry and mean it."
~ We all should know that pride can kill a good relationship. It's not about having the last word, being right or wrong. It's about a solution and possible yet respectful compromise. Simply knowing It's not that bad and you are not alone. Say to eachother," We can do this." Be selfless enough to do what's best for the both of us type of thing.
"Have a budget and live up to it."
~It's a sticky subject. However, financial strains also put a strain on the relationship. So keep it tight.
"Accentuate the positives."
~It's easy to nitpick and criticize and find negative things in eachother. No one is perfect though. So It's just as easy to focus on what they do that's right and to praise them for it. It made you happy didn't it? Reciprocity is key here.
Quite frankly I could go on and on about all of the things I've learned. This is just a start to an infinite list of things. I could write a book on it after being in a long term relationship as long as I have. You really should live, laugh and love together. You only get one life. Do it the best way you know how. Change things if you know deep down that you need to. Grow you know. Everyone changes at some point of every relationship so grow together. Afterall, if you don't like where you are you can always move. You are not a tree. Stagnation like many other things is a choice.
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